I'm pretty sure I've experienced every possible kind of living situation..
Sharing a room with a sibling? Been there
Four girls in one apartment? Definitely..
Two guys, two girls? Sounds weird.....but did that too... lol
Last month was kind of a special month for me for several different reasons. It marked a year since my college graduation, and also one year since moving to a new city. I was surprised at how quickly it went by because it didn't feel like a year had passed already. I was happy because it felt like I had something to celebrate. The ability to celebrate one year of change, survival, grinding, hard-work, laughs, new friendships, good times, and bad times. Throughout those 12 months sometimes I had to sit back and tell myself "damn girl you are really out here adulting in the best kind of way". Everyday I wake up in my own space, I feel so blessed and so thankful because I was able to move out so young and despite slight adversity, I was able to maintain.
Now, living with roommates definitely teaches you a lot about yourself in the sense of pet peeves, routine, and habits. But living alone.....teaches you even more than you think or thought you already knew. It literally only took a few months for me to realize certain things I do just because I know I'm in the comfort of my own space. For some odd reason, I have this habit of leaving all the kitchen cabinets wide open. I will open them to grab something whether it's seasoning, a plate, bowl, etc. and just not close them back......but it's not on purpose. I find it to be the weirdest thing but it's something I've noticed because I will literally walk back into the kitchen & ask myself "Why are the cabinets open?"
Nonetheless, whether you are living alone, living with your roommate(s) who are barely home or home too much, or even if you're planning to move out this read is for you. I'm gonna give you some generic yet not so generic things I've loved yet also hated since leaving the nest. So listennnnn upppp!
Pros
1. It's Ph**KN LIT!
There is nothing better than being in control of your own space and having your own rules. You are liable to do WHATEVER you want to do because quite frankly you pay the damn bills. There is nothing better than coming home to enjoy your own peace and silence. But at the same time it's also nice to kick back and throw on a nice station/podcast, pour a glass of red wine....or white depending on your mood.....maybe even light a candle, sage, or something else *cough.cough* (depending your preference lol) Living alone is lit because you get to catch a vibe by yourself free of any distractions or interruptions.
2. It Teaches You To Save Money
The more bills, the less you want to spend. If there's anything that I've learned it's prioritizing what needs to be spent and what doesn't. If you have food at home don't eat out. If you have money strictly for just bills......make sure you're only spending money on JUST BILLS. If you don't need to be shopping don't go to in sight of a store that you're likely to spend money. (I think were all a little guilty of that one)
3. The Naked Comfort
There is nothing more priceless than being able to walk around in your birthday suit not having to worry about someone walking through the front door. You embrace the comfort you have with yourself free of bodily shame from people who don't even matter. WARNING: Peeping Toms are a thing.....enjoy your naked comfort with the blinds closed at all times lol
4. Allows You To Become Selective About Your Inner Circle
Whether you're living with your parent(s), your roommate(s), or living by yourself.......your home should be a reflection of your sanctuary away from the outside world. Being aware of who you bring into that space is so important. Be selective about the energy you keep and the people you bring around your sanctuary. Not EVERYONE is worthy of being in your space.
5. The Relationship You Develop With Yourself
You gain this different sense of independence when you hit your 20's. You start to feel a sense of empowerment to become the absolute best version of yourself. But with that comes seeing the ugly sides too. You eventually start to develop this unintentional relationship with yourself in the sense of knowing what frustrates you, what inspires you, whats keeps you, and what really fuckin bothers you. The beauty of the independent relationship that you share with yourself is timeless.
Cons
1. Paying The Actual RENT
Now lets be real here, paying rent realllllyyy sucks. It's the most expensive bill that feels like it makes it's way around every 2 weeks. The only good thing is having 3 days to pay it. And best believe they get it from me on the 3rd every single time.
2. You Are The Only Person Holding Yourself Accountable
Sometimes it's hard being your own friend, cheerleader, advocate, and motivation when there's nobody physically around to pick you up when you're down. Of course family and friends are always a call or text away but you are the only person truly holding yourself accountable and the only person to blame if things aren't getting done is yourself. The holding yourself accountable part gets hard because in reality who enjoys being responsible?
3. It Gets Lonely...........(sometimes)
I'm one to frequently keep myself busy with things to avoid from overthinking and getting into sticky situations. However, keeping myself busy with a lot doesn't take away from the loneliness that starts to surface every now and then. If you ever find yourself in this situation maybe think about getting a pet, spending more time with your friends, picking up a hobby, journaling, experimenting with a new recipe, binge watch a new show, etc. The loneliness is only temporary but self-happiness is forever.
4. Living On The Top Floor
So of course prior to moving in I requested the third floor. Why? Well because queens sit at the top. (lol jk) I seriously hate hearing people on top of me. But living on the third floor does come with its downfalls. The top downfall being groceries. I absolutely hate going grocery shopping because of the fact that I'm the one that has to carry it all upstairs. Do you know how many rounds of groceries I have t go through before they're all out my car? And don't get me started with the pack of water. Nonetheless, keep these things in mind if you decide to snag your own apartment.
5. Furnishing Your Place
The furniture is probably the next worst thing after paying rent simply because it's so expensive. You want something that obviously looks some type of decent considering you're coming home to it every single day. With the help of amazing family and movers I was able to furnish majority of my apartment through Facebook Marketplace with everything being brand new......AND so can you! Living alone is all about budgeting and spending wisely. Don't go broke trying to look rich.
XOXO
Niyah
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